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How To Get Over a Boy (learn to self-love from Chidera Eggerue, author of the bestselling title What a Time to be Alone): For Women Who Date Men Hardcover – 6 Feb. 2020

by Chidera Eggerue (Author)

4.6 988 ratings

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Are you fed up with thinking about that guy every minute of every waking hour, when he doesn't even reply to your texts?

Are you reeling from the pain of a break-up, unsure of where to turn?

Are you single and looking to be happy with your choices in the face of society's constant questioning?

In How to Get Over a Boy, bestselling author Chidera Eggerue will show you, once and for all, how to reframe the stale goal of finding a man. She will equip you with tangible and applicable solutions for every part of your dating life, helping you recognise that men hold as much power in our romantic lives as we grant them.

In the past, dating books tend to lean more into the territory of 'how to make him find you hot!', 'how to make him jealous!', 'how to get him to propose!'. But these how-tos are placing men on a pedestal of being 'the prize'. Men are NEVER the prize. You are. Let The Slumflower show you why.

From the Publisher

Empower Yourself, Love Yourself

The Goal

'If you could see the person you're about to become on the other side of this breakup, you would drop everything and choose her right now. Even as the world burns down and the seas rise around us, you will always deserve a love that is safe, pure and boundless.' Chidera Eggerue

Chapters

YOU

Love Exactly Who You Are, Right Now
What Does the Love You Deserve Look Like?
The Most Important Opinion is the One You Have of Yourself
Teach People How to Treat You
Boundaries and How to Set Them Without Feeling Like a Bad Person

THEM

Stop Trying to Impress Him
Male Entitlement
Waiting for Someone to Miss You is the Biggest Waste of Your Time

US

We Are All Goddesses
The Saviour Complex

TOOLKIT

The Thirty Day No Contact Rule
Reward System
Further Reading

Product description

From the Back Cover

Are you fed up with thinking about that guy every minute of every waking hour, when he doesn't even reply to your texts? Are you reeling from the pain of a break-up, unsure of where to turn? Are you single and looking to be happy with your choices in the face of society's constant questioning?

In How to Get Over a Boy, bestselling author Chidera Eggerue will show you, once and for all, how to reframe the stale goal of finding a man. She will equip you with tangible and applicable solutions for every part of your dating life, helping you recognise that men hold as much power in our romantic lives as we grant them.

In the past, dating books tend to lean more into the territory of 'how to make him find you hot!', 'how to make him jealous!', 'how to get him to propose!'. But these how-tos are placing men on a pedestal of being 'the prize'. Men are NEVER the prize. You are. Let The Slumflower show you why.

About the Author

Referred to by Elle magazine as a millennial mastermind in their 'Stars On The Rise: 20 Power Players To Watch Out For In 2018' list, Chidera Eggerue is a best selling author and activist with a fast-growing audience of over 280,000 across her social media accounts. Her debut book, What a Time to be Alone, quickly became a top 10 bestseller and has sold over 50,000 copies to date. She has been featured in Elle, Vogue, Grazia and Stylist and has guest-edited Radio 4 s Today programme.

Product details

Publisher ‏ : ‎ Quadrille Publishing Ltd; 1st edition (6 Feb. 2020)
Language ‏ : ‎ English
Hardcover ‏ : ‎ 240 pages
ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1787134806
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1787134805
Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 14.99 x 2.41 x 22.61 cm

Best Sellers Rank: 141,457 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- 693 in Emotional Self Help
- 1,035 in Romantic Relationships
- 5,192 in Practical & Motivational Self Help

Customer reviews:
4.6 988 ratings

About the author

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Chidera Eggerue

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Chidera Eggerue aka The Slumflower

Best Selling Author of "What a Time To Be Alone", "Scribble Yourself Feminist", and "How to Get Over a Boy", Chidera Eggerue is an acclaimed, writer, and feminist. Referred to by Elle magazine as a 'millennial mastermind' Chidera created the hashtag #SAGGYBOOBSMATTER and has over 500k followers across her social media accounts. She is constantly featured in media titles including; Financial Times, Vogue, Playboy and Grazia, and starred in her own Channel 4 documentary "Bring Back the Bush" that TX-ed January 2020. She debuted her first live show "Chidera Eggerue: How To Get Over a Boy" to a sold-out audience.

Customer reviews

988 global ratings

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Customers say

Customers find the book engaging and empowering, with an interesting and informative content that helps build self-confidence. They praise the writing style as insightful and easy to read, with a great author.

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Readability Enlightened content Reading quality Writing style

20 customers mention ‘Readability’20 positive0 negative

Customers find the book easy to read and engaging. They describe it as an empowering, funny, and insightful read that they can finish in one sitting. The writing is well-crafted and informative, making it a must-read for women.

"Absolutely love this book! Well written and easy to read.. im not going through a break up at the moment but struggle to get over things...." Read more

"Best book I’ve read in a long time, really should have read this at the time of a toxic relationship, but glad to have read this now...." Read more

"I found this book to be very interesting, enlightening and informative. It's non-fictional and may help to build self confidence." Read more

"Great book. Need to re-read to put into practice and keep the stuff I learn at the forefront of my mind...." Read more

13 customers mention ‘Enlightened content’13 positive0 negative

Customers find the book's content empowering and informative. They say it helps build self-confidence and get their minds back on track. The book provides good advice on life skills and self-love.

"...Her feminist ways are so feminist they dont fit with the theoretical modern feminism we all preach but don’t/can’t practice." Read more

"...Gets your mind back on track... only thing I struggled with was the different colors pages and font. Passed onto a friend I loved it so much" Read more

"I found this book to be very interesting, enlightening and informative. It's non-fictional and may help to build self confidence." Read more

"...Loving yourself, your attachment style and boundaries etc. I can’t recommend Chidera’s books enough...." Read more

6 customers mention ‘Reading quality’6 positive0 negative

Customers find the book engaging and interesting. It provides food for thought and is empowering.

"I found this book to be very interesting, enlightening and informative. It's non-fictional and may help to build self confidence." Read more

"The book is more of a fun look out, there's not much to read in it...." Read more

"...a time when I had been single for a few months and it's given me so much food for thought...." Read more

"I enjoyed Chideras book a great deal and it’s very uplifting and interesting and powerful however find some of her ideas a little unlikely ..." Read more

5 customers mention ‘Writing style’5 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the writing style. They find it insightful, easy to read, and inspiring.

"Absolutely love this book! Well written and easy to read.. im not going through a break up at the moment but struggle to get over things...." Read more

"...I can’t recommend Chidera’s books enough. I love the way she writes and the book is so easy to read rather than your usual pages of writing." Read more

"...She is a great author who I follow on Instagram and have learnt a lot from. She is blunt and says it like it is which is refreshing." Read more

"Insightful writing- read it one sitting, I wished this kind of unapologetic feminism existed when I was younger...." Read more

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Top reviews from United Kingdom

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molly m.
Adore. Will read forever, & buy copies for all the women I know.
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 1 June 2020
Verified Purchase

But it now! Buy it, read it in one go because you will not be able to put it down and then read it again and again and again. That’s what I did. I pick this book up atleast once a week to either have a quick read over or to find the part that relates to me in that moment. This book is like a letter from the big sister I never had. Chidera is a QUEEN and if this book helps you to see the world and yourself even a little bit like she does then you’ll benefit. Her feminist ways are so feminist they dont fit with the theoretical modern feminism we all preach but don’t/can’t practice.

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8 people found this helpful

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Amazon Customer
Great read.. highly recommended
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 16 March 2021
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Absolutely love this book! Well written and easy to read.. im not going through a break up at the moment but struggle to get over things. Gets your mind back on track... only thing I struggled with was the different colors pages and font. Passed onto a friend I loved it so much

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Amazon Customer
Amazing amazing book :)
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 26 June 2020
Verified Purchase
Best book I’ve read in a long time, really should have read this at the time of a toxic relationship, but glad to have read this now.
The insight on who I can become is super exciting for me now, every girl should read this, no matter what age or stage you are in life!
It’s also made me realise about the attachment types and I’ve related so much to so much of what was said in this book.

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A
Informative
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 20 May 2020
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I found this book to be very interesting, enlightening and informative. It's non-fictional and may help to build self confidence.

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Ellie Garthwaite
Buy even if you don’t have a boy to get over!
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 22 June 2020
Verified Purchase
Even if you don’t have a boy to get over, I would still recommend this book because it doesn’t just talk about getting over a boy, it talks about you. Loving yourself, your attachment style and boundaries etc. I can’t recommend Chidera’s books enough. I love the way she writes and the book is so easy to read rather than your usual pages of writing.

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Ellie Garthwaite

Buy even if you don’t have a boy to get over!

Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 22 June 2020
Even if you don’t have a boy to get over, I would still recommend this book because it doesn’t just talk about getting over a boy, it talks about you. Loving yourself, your attachment style and boundaries etc. I can’t recommend Chidera’s books enough. I love the way she writes and the book is so easy to read rather than your usual pages of writing.

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10 people found this helpful

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Amazon Customer
Amazing!!!
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 7 May 2020
Verified Purchase
I absolutely love Childera Eggerue, her books are inspirational and this book is another one of my favourites. It’s not all about getting over a boy, it goes into other areas such as inner confidence. Every time I read any book by Childera I always feel so empowered after. 10/10!!!

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One person found this helpful

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Amazon Customer
It's alright
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 6 January 2023
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The book is more of a fun look out, there's not much to read in it. More of pictures and motivational quotes etc, in a whole book there's only few pages to read tbh.

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GG
Buy it! Sharpen your awareness
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 19 June 2020
Verified Purchase
Great book.
Need to re-read to put into practice and keep the stuff I learn at the forefront of my mind.
She is a great author who I follow on Instagram and have learnt a lot from. She is blunt and says it like it is which is refreshing.

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Top reviews from other countries

Amazon Customer
Great book
Reviewed in Canada on 25 February 2024
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I read it a long time ago so I don’t remember exactly details but I do remember it helped me, it was easy to read, the layout and design is cool, and I felt good about it

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Heather Olivia
Some of these reviews missed the point - this book is ground breaking
Reviewed in the United States on 19 April 2021
Verified Purchase
After reading this book, I delved into the reviews again and was suprised to see all these negative thoughts on the book. I had seen these reviews originally when purchasing the book but decided to give it a try regardless. In my opinion, all these negative reviews either majorly missed the point or they clearly "already have" this information. Which then makes me wonder why they feel they would need this book to begin with.

The book answers the question of "how to get over a boy" by saying many many different good things. It comes from a feminist stand point, so it's main take away is this - you can learn a lot of things from relationships after theyre said and done, but the biggest you can learn is that you have inherent value that cant be taken away by another person (or boy). And allowing your mind to focus on this boy or person you no longer have in your life keeps you from seeing that value yourself, which may lead to more hard future relationships.

It then goes on to give tips on empowering yourself and seeing that value, which may be hard to see if you have had hard unhealthy relationships in the past.

This empowerment will allow you to realize that anyone who doesn't value you doesn't deserve your physical or emotional time.

Many people said that this book has a "one mans trash is another mans treasure" attitude. Which, in my mind, makes me wonder if they speed read this entire book.

There is a whole chapter on seeing your own value, not waiting on a man or anyone else to see your value, and to realise that you are an amazing person all on your own. That another person compliments your greatness, but doesnt make it.

This book mentions men quite a lot, because for a long of teens and young women, society teaches that our value only comes from being viewed as pretty or interesting by men. The text slowly tries to point out that you are important and special, regardless if there is a person there noticing and saying so or not.

Summary: So yes, men are mentioned a lot, because it's in the title. "How to get over a boy" isn't really about getting over one specific boy or man, but really the ideology that all men should be so important in our minds to begin with. It's getting over *all* men, to become the best version of yourself.

Overall a wonderful read, and as a 22 year old female that grew up in a religious household pushing patriarchal ideals down my throat, this was honestly a massive eye opener. I would highly reccomend to anyone of any gender. Women need to be empowered, men need to see how women are feeling and perhaps change accordingly, and everyone else can simply enjoy the new ideas presented. :)

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Juju
Great
Reviewed in the United Arab Emirates on 8 September 2021
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Great book … empowering

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Vika
Although the title suggests it, it's not really a breakup but rather a (great) (f)empowering book
Reviewed in Germany on 10 February 2021
Verified Purchase
With her second book, Chidera again created a really beautiful piece of art and literature, where she takes the reader by the hand and empowers them through her writing. It is not necessarily a book for people that struggle from a bad relationship or just broke up with someone. It rather teaches the reader to love and put themselves first instead of always prioritizing other people. It gave me personally a lot of energy to have difficult conversations and focus on myself more - benefitting my relationship, at the same time, greatly.

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Danya Davidson
Brilliant
Reviewed in Spain on 7 September 2020
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So easy to understand and beautiful illustration etc

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How To Get Over a Boy (learn to self-love from Chidera Eggerue, author of the bestselling title What a Time to be Alone): For Women Who Date Men Hardcover – 6 Feb. 2020

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From the Publisher

Empower Yourself, Love Yourself

The Goal

Chapters

YOU

THEM

US

TOOLKIT

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From the Back Cover

About the Author

Product details

About the author

Chidera Eggerue

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Buy even if you don’t have a boy to get over!

Top reviews from United Kingdom

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Buy even if you don’t have a boy to get over!

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5.0 out of 5 stars Great book

5.0 out of 5 stars Some of these reviews missed the point - this book is ground breaking

4.0 out of 5 stars Great

5.0 out of 5 stars Although the title suggests it, it's not really a breakup but rather a (great) (f)empowering book

5.0 out of 5 stars Brilliant

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Great book

Some of these reviews missed the point - this book is ground breaking

Great

Although the title suggests it, it's not really a breakup but rather a (great) (f)empowering book

Brilliant